Monday, April 27, 2009

Temporary Retreatment

















It's time for me to go inward for a wee bit. Last week Zack had a sinus infection and missed two days of school. I was being cautious in terms of Hefneresque hand-washings, immune boosting etc. but could feel my body at the edge of sickness. I was working with pretty much trick that Lalitha has ever taught me and felt good about just barely averting illness.

But...I showed up on Friday for day one of Sacred Art of Dying Part II...hit a very intense emotional state and a cold/flu thinging came in like gangbusters.

I came home Saturday late afternoon and got straight into a hot bath and then went to bed. I got intense chills to the point that I slept with a very heavy wool hat on. Every time I had to get out of bed, it took my almost an hour to stop shivering. I just don't get sick like that normally and when I phoned Janie at Callanish to let her know that I just couldn't go to the last day of the workshop, she commented that my white blood-cell count is likely low and that's why I was feeling so ill. That reminded my that my oncologist had mentioned that it was already suppressed before my last dose of chemo.

This week on Wednesday afternoon I will have my next set of blood work done and meet with my oncologist who will have results from a CT scan that was done a couple of weeks ago, tumour markers (I already know that two are going in the right direction and that one is not) and my blood-work results. There is a certain level when the WBC count is too low to the point that one's chemo protocol is delayed. It is my understanding that I need to make great effort to avoid this so that I may continue my chemo cocktails at the optimal kill-the-cancer-but-not-quite-the person pace.

Chemo is scheduled for this Friday though there are a number of possible scenarios under which that may not happen. I'll know more Wednesday. Waiting for test results is really one of my least favourite things though it is a great opportunity to practice being in the moment. Really. Either my scan is better or it is worse. Either the tumour markers will cause my oncologist to suggest a change in my protocol or they won't. Either my white blood-cell count will allow me to continue chemo or it won't. All I can do about all of that is to take good care of my body. I rest is out of my hands...at least until Wednesday.

I have two days and lots of appointments and work to get done before chemo and it is sunny and the garden beckons as does my comfy bed and chairs placed strategically for maximizing vitamin D intake.

So...Saturday I spent the entire day either in bed or sorting through mountains of papers looking for things for my accountant and on Sunday...weeble that I am...I started to feel distinctly better. It helped of course that it was a glorious day. Some plants got planted...there was a lot of sibling trampoline bouncing...there was the traditional first day of the "music" truck (aka ice cream truck so named for the benefit of a mother with two young kids (me). The kids were four and two when I revealed to them that the nice man in the music truck was even nicer than they had imagined) driving by, opening of the wallet of the Mama as she gardens and the kids play/provoke one another.

Then into the car to take Charlotte to a class. I ended up with 90 minutes to have lunch and poke about the artisan co-ops at Granville Island. Charlotte joined me after her class and we ended our afternoon with some mother/daughter bonding over many things beautiful, innovative and well-crafted.

So...I am much better than I was two days ago and I need to be even better by Wednesday so I am putting myself on an energy-expenditure diet and going to try to slow down my pace.

I wish you all your desired mix of doing and of being. Ahhhhhhhhh...

Friday, April 24, 2009

Sacred Art of Dying II

I return to Callanish in the City for Part II of their inaugural workshop on the Sacred Art of Dying, today and tomorrow from 10am-5pm. Part of me would like to just stay close to home, spending the day divided between jewellery design, house de-disasterifying and gardening. Part of me is so happy to be back in the company of the very fine folk who source Callanish and the seven other participants.


I write this watching the sun rise colouring up the eastern sky, birds at the feeder, and reflect on the crazy month that I have had since Part I of the workshop. I have discovered advocacy and been part of a "take back Pacific Spirit Park" whistle initiative, started a new blog entitled: http://bethechangeyouwanttoseeinvancouver.blogspot.com/, written to the BC Cancer Agency about their--in my BFO--very unsavoury snack trolley and upon posting the letter on that blog after almost a month of awaiting a written response, received a hand-delivered letter from them less than 24 hours after mentioning that I was wondering about being in touch with some of my media contacts. I also with great efficiency was able to promote a very neat Earth Day event held in the parking lot of Lord Byng Secondary. Best Buy accepted people's old electronics to keep them out of the landfill. I heard through another parent that they had five times the response that had been expected. Thanks to all who participated and who now have less clutter in their homes.


I also had the great honour of being at the birth of friends' strapping bonny lad. That is truly a delicious memory. And then there was the meeting of this new being two days later with Zack and Charlotte. That was just an immense thrill for all of us.


I feel so full of live these days and know that it is because of being reminded of how precious and uncertain life is. I will go to Callanish to do the deepest work I am capable of so that I can maintain this appreciation of this life that is available to me this moment, moment, moment.


"A good death does honor to a whole life." ~Petrarch


"Apply yourself now, that at the hour of death, you may be glad and unafraid." ~Thomas à Kempis


"In my end is my beginning." ~T.S. Eliot


"When someone is born we rejoice,
When someone is married we celebrate
But when someone dies, we pretend that nothing happened." ~Margaret Mead

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Perfect Day for Even a Moment of Holiday


Happy Spectacular Day dear Vancouver followers and lurkers! This is what we've all waited for--our first high-pressure system. Long may it last. All hail King Soleil. Roll-up those sleeves, don those groovy shades, smile at random people, get out of your car: walk and bike. Grab lunch in the sun. Plant the plant you bought on Earth Day. Hug a kid (if they are known to you). Spring has sprung!

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Life is No Brief Candle to Me

This is the true joy in life, to be used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one, to be thoroughly worn out before you are thrown on the scrap heap. To be a force of nature instead of a feverish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy. I am a member of a community and as a member it is my privilege to do for it whatever I can before I die. Life is no brief candle to me. It is a sort of splendid torch that I want to make burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations.”

George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950)Irish literary Critic, Playwright and Essayist1925 Nobel Prize for Literature

Photo by Gabe Kircheimer

Monday, April 20, 2009

I'm a Weeble...

and as we all know: Weebles Wobble But They Don't Fall Down.


No matter what is thrown my way these days...and there has been a lot, much more than would be appropriate to put into a blog...I somehow keep managing to pop back up. Yes I do fall over. I go out, I appear to have tons of energy, be animated and engaged and then as soon as I am hope I go to bed.

For about a week to ten days after each chemo round, I am very low functioning. Then there is daily life of a single mom with a teen and a tween, that requires some sharp thinking which is on the other end of the continuum from chemo brain. Then there are interactions with the outside world. I have been saying for about a week now: "I'm just one side of crazy, but I'm not sure which."

On Saturday I was on the wrong side of crazy and realized yesterday that I must, must, must be much more judicious with my energy expenditure if I am going to somehow be able to "buy" an big fat life extension.

Luckily for me I have the resilient gene. I am a weeble and thankfully weebles wobble but they don't fall down.


http://www.weebles-wobble.com/


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Weeble



And, of course, today's post would not be complete without a mention of our Canucks who are leading the first series of the playoffs against the Blues 3-0.

My resident statistician informs me that only two teams in the entire NHL history have come back from being down 3-0 in any series.

I made Zack cross when we were watching the final minutes of yesterday's game. I said "I feel sorry for the Blues." Zack looked at me in horror, asking me how on earth I could say that and telling me that I must leave the room if I planned on continuing on with that tack. I said that I a mom and I just can't help it but I did zip it as there is nothing more fun that watching playoff hockey with my boy when it's the Canucks who are playing and whoopin' the Blues.

Saturday, April 18, 2009

What's New Pussycat?

Yesterday, at the time that I would usually be entertaining myself with some new blog entry whilst watching the day dawn, drinking green tea and perusing The Globe and Mail and The Vancouver Sun, I receive the call. The call that I have been ready and waiting for for days. The call that I feared might come during last weekend's chemo combat recovery period. But no, it came yesterday!

Oh. You're wondering what on earth I'm on about? Well, it's not really my news to tell so here's the highly-edited version.

I had the great honour of being invited to be present and involved at the birth of a very, very dear friend's first child. It is the very first time that I have had such an invitation. It was of course the third birth I have been present at, if one can be called "present" during labour but the very first time that I was not the one doing all the hard work.

Mama and Baby did their parts impeccably and are doing great and Dad is justifiably, chest-swellingly proud of both of them.

I spent the late afternoon with my Mama hat back on, profoundly effected by what I had witnessed in the morning. The miracle of life. The abilities of two humans to make another human. The perfection that is a new human being.

Charlotte was having a very brief--I need food--tween moment and I said to her that she was lucky that I had had such a brilliant experience earlier in the day and was feeling so ecstatic otherwise she would have been on the receiving end of a very cranky Mama.

And another thing.........CANUCKS ROCK!

According to the statistician-in-residence, 90% of teams who win the first two games of a playoff series go on to win the series.

Have an awesome weekend.
Zoë

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Going Global--Maiwa auction Thursday, April 16th, 7:30pm in the Net Loft on Granville Island

Ajrakh Auction

Thursday, April 16th at 7:30 pm in the Net Loft on Granville Island

Join us [Maiwa] as we transform the Net Loft into a gallery. There will be a multi-media presentation and talk by Charllotte Kwon on the Khatri community of traditional blockprinters from Dhamadka, India, and the present water crisis.

There will be music, food, refreshments, and wine. But the most exciting part of the evening will be the live auction of textiles. Exquisite double sided ajrakhs, textiles from the Maiwa Collection, Jewelry and other items will be put up for bid.

During this evening, the Maiwa store will be open and 100% of the sale price of all items sold will be donated to the Foundation for Project Dhamadka.
Due to limited space please
RSVP to Maiwa 604 669 3939
or maiwa@maiwa.com
Please come and support us.

Want to Know More?
We've put pictures of these incredible double sided auction pieces up in a previous post.
Curious about how an ajrakh is made?
We've put up pictures of one cloth going through sixteen stages of production. With a double-sided ajrakh these stages must be performed on each side of the cloth. It takes an entire set of wooden blocks to print an ajrakh. Sometimes the pattern is asymetric - this means a separate set of blocks must be carved for each side.
The pi�ce de r�sistance? A double-sided ajrakh printed with different colours on each side!
Want to hear the Khatris themselves speak about ajrakh?
Listen to our three podcasts featuring the Khatri brothers from Dhamadka and Ajrakpur.
Excerpts from
Masters of the Art
The Khatri Blockprinters of Dhamadka and Ajrakhpur
Part 1 - Presentation
Razzaque Mohammed Khatri and Ismail Mohammed Khatri
with Eiluned Edwards
Excerpts from
Masters of the Art
The Khatri Blockprinters of Dhamadka and Ajrakhpur
Part 2 - Questions from the Audience with
Razzaque Mohammed Khatri and Ismail Mohammed Khatri
and Eiluned Edwards
Excerpts from
Kismet, Ajrakh, and the Fish of Knowledge:
Collaborating with Craftspeople in India
Eiluned Edwards

When The Going Gets Tough, The Tough Go on a Holiday!

Yesterday was an awesome, gorgeous sunny day and so after my 2 1/2 hour session with my wonderful TCM/not-so-tiny-needle torture doctor...direct quote: "If the point is 'strong' like that, you know it's the right point"....'strong' being a euphamism that for being brought to instinctive in-hard-labour breathing (apologies to those who haven't had being at a birth/birthing and have no idea what I am talking about)...I went on a 3 1/2 hour holiday.


First, to get into that holiday mode toute de suite, I walked a few blocks, down some scary stairs (should have had my whistle with me!) and hopped onto the wee ferry boat that after $3 and about as many minutes I was on an island!

All that sea air gave me an appetite so my first stop was the Indian food stall for a thali plate of curried cabbage, spinach and potato. I of course ate in the courtyard and as a tourist took photos of other tourists and had my photo taken.

I told the group of Brits whose photo I had just taken, that they were getting a wildly incorrect experience of Vancouver weather and that before they decide that they want to immigrate here that they should know that this was our nicest day in seven months and that we have the same shite weather hear as they do in the U.K.

After lunch, I poked about some of the shops, did my part to help out the B.C. economy and then walked up to 4th to take the bus home. I still had a few minutes when I got home to sit in the sun on the back deck, hang some laundry on the line, watch the birds, delight in the blooming flowers and budding shrubs.

We made it through the winter!

Monday, April 13, 2009

Chemo Combat..................................Me and my Mutt Kickin' Big "C's" Butt

Chemo combat:

Day 1: 6 hours of pre-meds and chemo. Fabulously distracted by dear friends.

Day 2: Woke up with no side effects other than extreme fatigue. Stayed in bed all day other than getting up to let the dog out or grab a snack.

Day 3: Woke up and was suddenly wildly nauseous, remembered that I still had one more anti-nausea pill to take (1 each for day 1-3 for a total of $100 + tax....this is what you buy for someone going through chemo...flowers are nice but wonderdrugs are nicer!). I pulled off a walk with Sadie at the local park and then was back to bed and crazy symptoms....feverishly hot, jaw-crushing pain, tingling in hands and feet, racing heart, faintness when standing, breakthrough nausea...it went on for hours with me looking at over a half-dozen prescription bottles thinking "okay, what to take, when to take, how much to take, and if too much, will I wake?"

Day 4: Good news. I did wake up. Sunny. Good. Brain. Dead. Kids. Coming back in a couple hours.


Can't wait for my own personal resurrection.

Sunday, April 12, 2009

"Too Good" as my buddy Kelly would say...

I was looking to see if the VSB had issued a media release about the Byng whistle distribution and found an online report that had a reference to and a quote from me. Out of curiousity I read the article and then read the 36 comments that had been posted regarding the news story (I wonder at the free time some people have, anyway...)

I came across:

Posted 2009/04/09 at 1:11 AM ET--wrenn1 wrote:

"Just saw "Zoe"'s tv appearance. She scares me with or without her whistle. "

You can vote for or against the comment. I voted for it, as had 10 and 1 voted against...that was probably my Mom.

"Too Good" as Kelly always says after we've split a gut over some non-fiction event.

If you want to learn more about what random strangers think of "Zoë Lewis" please click on:

http://www.cbc.ca/canada/british-columbia/story/2009/04/08/bc-body-park-reopens.html#socialcomments

p.s. I look at this photo and I kind of scare myself...as my face gets smaller, my teeth get bigger....grrrrrrr.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Adventures in Chemoland: Episode #4




















Chemo #4: 4/10/09--"Good" Friday--Herceptin, Taxol and Carboplatin

I was in a complete state the entire night, a dark night of the soul as intense as any I've ever had and I've had many. I kept thinking about Wendy Ladner-Beaudry, the woman who was murdered in Pacific Spirit Park on Friday, April 3 as she was jogging. The killer has not been caught and the police are saying that they have no suspects.

I was feeling exhausted from the week. Personal hassles. Whistle co-ordinating. Media interviews and Chemo. God I hate chemo. It is so brutally hard to be doing this to my body and yet...it seems to be working...symptoms of the cancer are lessening though it is clear that the cancer has not miraculously vanished.

I desperately did not want to go to the Agency. I slow-poked my way through the early morning packing up all of my soothing comforts and distractions. I was so worried about my fragile state, thinking if I feel so ill and wasted now what am I going to feel like after the chemo? I tearfully phoned my dear friend Dolly and she dropped everything and came and picked me up and took me to the Cancer Agency. I had asked Natasha the night before if she might stop in...we ended up having a bit of a party.

Natasha and Dolly were all dolled up looking gorgeous in their colourful outfits showing lots of cleavage. Their two chairs formed a circle of protection around me.

Natasha brought bright pink heart stickers which we stuck on all of the chemo bags labelled: "Spectacular Healing Juice".

My session lasted for 6 hours. I had about an hour's nap after the Benedryl (one of the "pre-meds") which gave Dolly and Natasha a chance to bond some more...this was only their second time seeing one another but both Dolly and Kelly felt the same way I did from the first moments of meeting Natasha. The rest of time we just told stories and laughed. The time really flew. The experience was enhanced by the fact that I lucked out and got chemo nurse Fran who is both highly competent and extremely lovely. You can just see the back of her behind D. & N.

We walked out of the building. Dolly http://www.dolly.hopkins.com/ took off to meet up with her team who are helping to staging a huge Earth Day event at Jericho Beach on April 18th from 11 am - 4 pm. http://www.evergreen.ca/earthdayvancouver/

Nathasha had a bit of time before hooking up with another friend and so we grabbed a bit at the Eatery. I had an enormous Lava Roll and a pint of Russell Cream Ale and then since it was so delicious together and I was still hungry, I ordered another roll and another pint. Natasha drove me home and came in long enough to fall in love with the noble mutt and threaten to dognap her. I hung out with Sadie for a while, read for a bit and fell asleep.

I slept very soundly until about 7:30am and woke up with absolutely no chemo side-effects other than extreme fatigue. Was it because of the pink heart stickers saying "Spectacular Healing Juice" on the chemo bags or was it the wonderful, wonderful company of two girlfriends who "get" me or was it the 2 pints of dark beer? I'll never know for sure but I sure am grateful! May it last, last, last.

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Way Too Busy to Have Cancer

Dear Followers and Lurkers,

My attention has been captivated...at least until my next chemo combat this "good" Friday.

If you want to know more, check out:

http://bethechangeyouwanttoseeinvancouver.blogspot.com/

I hope that you'll be inspired to "Be the Change You Want to See in Vancouver."

It's really fun being an activist...try it, you'll see.

~Zoë

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Save UBC Farm--TODAY--and a...

Shout Out to Evi !

The Great Farm Trek ‘09

HOW YOU CAN HELP save UBC Farm. Come to the Great Farm Trek 2009!

Today: Tuesday, April 7

Personal aside: This would have been my beloved grandmother Evi's 98th Birthday. The kids and I had a wonderful dinner and fire ceremony honoring her. In our family, honoring our ancestors involves chocolate, a lot of chocolate. The act of participating in the UBC Farm's trek is a way of us honoring our children and our children's children. I will be there, at least for part of the time. Hope to see you....

okay back to The Great Trek blurb:

The Trek will gather at the Student Union Building at 3:30 p.m. and trekkers will walk to the UBC Farm for a celebration with food and music, and a ceremonial planting. Free parking is available at UBC Farm anytime, and a free bus shuttle will take you from there to the Trek in progress between 3 p.m. and 6 p.m.To get involved, email

Come help celebrate the UBC Farm and its future! It has been a great year for the farm, in terms of innovative programming, awards, and media attention. However, the future of the 24 hectare farm is still not clear, so it is time to come together to celebrate the Farm’s accomplishments and show our unified support for a bright future for the Farm! This is a celebratory, family-friendly event. We want thousands to join us as we trek from the UBC Student Union Building (SUB) via the Board of Governors meeting and then on to the UBC Farm.

We invite you to please book off Tuesday, April 7, 2009 from 3:30 p.m. into the early evening to attend the Great Farm Trek 2009! If you can’t make it until after work, we will be shuttling late-comers by bus from free parking areas near UBC Farm directly to the Trek crowd anytime between 3 p.m. and 6 p.m. After 6 p.m., the crowds will be located at the UBC Farm for festivities. Come to the UBC Farm, 6182 South Campus Road for free parking (see map) http://www.landfood.ubc.ca/ubcfarm/images/new-farm-directions.jpgBring costumes, music, banners, posters, spirit, kids, moving art shows, farm love, floats, hot air balloons, circus performers, sandwich boards, party favours, whistles, bells, dancers, fire twirlers, clowns, bicycles, novelty cars, trapeze artists, scooters, painted school buses, TV Camera crews, and other sundry fun items. Oh yes, bring snacks, water, and weather-appropriate clothing. The event will happen rain or shine!

During the Trek we will have Vancouver’s own ever-wacky and danceable Carnival Band, the high-energy percussion ensemble known as Sambata, Papa Thom from the Shepherd’s Pie Tour ’09, Agora String Band, and much more! At the UBC farm there will be music (the soul-quakin’, boot-shakin’ bluegrass boys of the Agora String Band, and the hip hop alt country tom waits-sylin’ Blackberry Wood.) As well there will be food, addresses from James Mackinnon (100-Mile Diet author,) Rex Weyler (Greenpeace founder), special recorded greetings from David Suzuki, and the Mayor of Vancouver, and a ceremonial planting

friendsoftheubcfarm@gmail.com if you have questions. For a route map and event location see:http://www.amsubc.ca/index.php/ams/news/ams_great_farm_trek_2009/
Also on Facebook: Great Farm Trek 2009
We can’t wait to see you there! Save the Farm: Join the Trek!

The Schedule
2:30 p.m.: Shuttles and van drivers start running between UBC Farm and SUB (until 8 p.m.)
3:15 p.m. to 4:30 p.m.: Gathering at the SUB
3:15 p.m.: Sambata, fantastic percussion ensemble, performs!
3:45 p.m.: Shane Pointe — Traditional Musqueam welcome
3:55 p.m.: Rex Weyler — founder of Greenpeace
4:00 p.m.: James Mackinnon — co-author of the100-Mile Diet: A Year of Local Eating
4:05 p.m.: Michael Duncan – AMS welcome
4:15 p.m.: Trek departs SUB
4:30 p.m.: Trek passes Board of Governors meeting
5:45 p.m.: Trek begins arriving at UBC Farm
5:45 p.m.: Agora String Band and Planting Ceremony
6:30 p.m.: Mark Bomford — UBC Farm welcome
6:35 p.m.: David Suzuki and Gregor Robertson video addresses
6:45 p.m.: Blackberry Wood
7:45 p.m.: Andrea Morgan — (Friends of the Farm) Closing
8 p.m.: Time to go home


Top
PAST: UBC Farm HistoryAs one of the founding faculties at UBC, agriculture has played a major role in academic and land-use activities at the University. The University was initially established around a 100 hectare farm.


Over time, as the UBC population grew and buildings expanded, the farm was re-located from main campus to mid-campus. After extensive research into the best possible remaining site for a farm on campus, farm activities were re-located again in the 1970s to their current location across 16th Avenue in south campus. During this time, the academic focus of UBC shifted to other areas. Field trials gave way to lab tests, and the importance of integrated sustainable field agriculture was de-emphasized.


In 1997, UBC’s Official Community Plan (OCP) was approved. UBC identified the last remaining on-campus working landscapes (the vestiges of our agricultural heritage in the south and mid-campus areas, including the farm) for housing development. However, the faculty of land and food systems’s curriculum and vision changes in 1999 to 2000 as well as renewed student interest prompted a fresh look at the on campus agricultural land base, focusing on new possibilities for the south campus fields. In 2000, the faculty published a paper entitled,“Reinventing the UBC Farm,” articulating a vision for renewing the existing land base as an integrated farm system focused on hands-on sustainability education.


The development and growth of the UBC Farm, also referred to as the Centre for Sustainable Food Systems (CSFS,) during the last nine years follows the general vision first shared in the “reinventing” document, with some refinements to its scope and programs. The strong student leadership that was crucial for the farm’s “re-invention” gave rise to a focus on student-centred learning as the primary mandate of the CSFS. Closely interwoven with an emerging research program and community service activities, the “new” farm can be considered a direct descendant of the University farm first envisioned in 1915.
Over the last century agriculture has left a rich legacy to UBC. As we enter the 21st century with all its associated ecological challenges, the UBC Farm provides a place of rich learning on a many of the key sustainability issues of our time.


Top
PRESENT:The Vancouver Campus Planning process and the UBC FarmIn 2007 the UBC Farm hosted 41 for-credit student courses, over 2,000 students, over 20,000 visitors. The Farm also hosted 35 active research projects from 14 of UBC’s faculties, schools, and colleges on some of the most challenging sustainability issues of our time such as low-carbon food production, alternative energy, nutrient cycling, and honeybee colony collapse disorder, to name a few. It is home to a Saturday farm market during the summer season, and a number of innovative programs that involve residents from the Downtown Eastside, children from various Vancouver schools, academics, youth, elders, and everyone in between.


In response to Campus Planning’s proposals to shrink and move the UBC Farm to make way for housing development, UBC staff, students, and community members have worked very hard during the last year to preserve the UBC Farm and promote a vision for its future. Among other achievements, this year of work resulted in hundreds of letters written in support of the UBC Farm (including a from Dr. David Suzuki) and a motion of support for the farm was unanimously passed by the Metro Vancouver Board. At the November 27, 2008 Board of Governors (BoG) meeting, AMS, GSS, and Friends of the UBC Farm representatives collaborated on a presentation conveying the farm’s importance in helping make UBC a global leader in sustainability. The BoG responded with a media release in which they directed the UBC administration to conduct an academic planning process for the 24 hectare farm to determine how best to make it an “academically rigorous and globally significant” centre for sustainability research and teaching. This represents a positive step forward. Students and the broader community want to make a clear statement before the end of this school year that it is critical to sustainability education at UBC to keep the farm at its current 24 hectare size and location, to provide stable funding for the farm’s programs and operations, and to include key farm users in determining the shape of the farm’s future.


Top
FUTURE: The Great Farm TrekThe AMS decided to organize the Great Farm Trek 2009 to celebrate all that the farm has accomplished in the last nine years, and to send a very clear message to UBC that thousands of people from the academic and wider community support the farm and wish to see it preserved and supported for the future of students and faculty at UBC, residents of Vancouver and B.C., and citizens of the world concerned about sustainability.
This is following upon a long history of Treks at UBC. In 1915, UBC halted construction on its Point Grey campus due to WWI shortages, which left students increasingly cramped on a makeshift campus (now the site of Vancouver General Hospital.) After collecting petition signatures and gaining media and public support, in 1922 1,200 students marched from their makeshift campus to the Point Grey campus to demand the provincial government resume building on the site. The students dedicated a stone cairn as a symbolic foundation for the long-term prosperity of the campus. Under the student and public pressure, the provincial government resumed building.


In that time honoured tradition that has given us our beautiful campus, we will trek to the UBC Farm to show our strong support for its future. With seeds and plants in hand, we will march to the Farm and put them in the ground as a symbol of the desire to grow deep roots at the Farm site for the kind of innovative teaching and research about sustainability issues that future generations will need. Come help us save Vancouver’s last working farm!

for more info, please see: http://www.amsubc.ca/index.php/student_government/sub%20page/category/great_farm_trek_09/

Monday, April 6, 2009

Mad As Hell

I am taking the tragedy involving Wendy Ladner-Beaudry very seriously and very personally. I was literally in Pacific Spirit Park that afternoon, and can you imagine, my friend was telling me about the Safe Teen presentation that was offered up Lord Byng PAC (Zack and her kids' high school) and we were talking about a "Wise Woman's" response to creepy guys would be.
http://www.theglobeandmail.com/servlet/story/RTGAM.20090404.wladner0404/BNStory/National/?page=rss&id=RTGAM.20090404.wladner0404

I said that I thought that the wise response to a creep is to not provoke but to let the creep know that he/she has picked the wrong person through body language etc...kind of like a velvet glove over a tire iron.

I don't know if this meets the definition of a "Wise Woman" response but I intend one way or another to buy up a quantity of very loud whistles and to hand them out to whomever might be interested. I contacted Mountain Equipment Co-op asking if they would be willing to give me a price break. I also contacted the principal of Lord Byng to see if they might be interested in whistles that are made available free-of-charge to her students and staff. She wrote me back right away saying that Byng would be very interested.

If anyone has any other idea, other sources if MEC isn't interested, please post a comment. I am thinking of trying 3 Vets next but time is of the essence.

The friend that I was walking in the wooods with on Friday said that she will no longer go on her own. I am not willing to give a creep free rein over Pacific Spirit Park. I want to be safe and I want to be able to go into the woods. I am mad as hell and I will not back down.
"Mounties are still warning the public about being safe in Lower Mainland parks because her death may have been a random violent attack.

Here are some safety tips from the RCMP :
* Always walk, jog or cycle with a companion.
* Do not wear headphones, you need to know what is going on around you.
* Carry a whistle or battery-powered personal alarm device with you.
* Always have your car keys handy so you can get into your car quickly.
* Tell a friend or family member where you are heading and the route you will be taking, and how long you will be there.
* Take a cell phone with you.
* Vary the times you use any trails.
* Wear bright-colored clothes to improve your visibility.
* Try to avoid heavily wooded areas, secluded areas, or areas which would offer poor visibility."

Sunday, April 5, 2009

OMG, BBF is like so totally over...


On Friday night, Charlotte had some girlfriends over--there were five of them who were 12 or are soon-to-be 12. As the head bus-girl and dishwasher, there were wiffs of conversations that my senses picked up.

Some of them greatly concerned me. Some of them I could/can do something about and some relate to the nature that is Grade 6 girl. Moving on to what impacts me/you guys. Apparently I did not make up the acronym BBF.

Googling, I discovered that there were many definitions for the acronym "BBF:"

BBF
Blackbird, Fly (Japan, camera)
BBF
Brother's Brother Foundation (Pittsburgh, PA)
BBF
Big Block Ford
BBF
Buffet Breakfast
BBF
Box/Box/File (file cabinet under the work surface)
BBF
Bumblefoot (band)
BBF
Border Book Festival (Las Cruces, New Mexico)
Bbf
Betriebsbahnhof (German: Service Yard)
BBF
British Baseball Federation
BBF
Bursty Bulk Flow
BBF
Baptized by Fire (gaming clan)
BBF
Best Best Friend
BBF
Best Buds Forever
BBF
Burlington, Massachusetts (Airport Code)
BBF
Blood or Body Fluid
BBF
Be Back in a Few
BBF
Balance Brought Forward
BBF
Branded by Fire (youth conference)
BBF
Best Boy Friend
BBF
Belly Button Fluff
BBF
Burger Boy Food-O-Rama (Ohio fast food chain)
BBF
Brass Band Festival
BBF
BigBrotherFans.org (online community and bittorrent tracker)
BBF
Blue Box Fraud (Sprint)
BBF
Blackberry Friendly
BBF
Bargain Box Fabrics (Australia)
BBF
Bulletin des Bibliotechques de France (France)
BBF
Borden Burger Foods
BBF
Brain Stem Blood Flow
BBF
Baja By Fountain (Fountain Powerboat Industries)
BBF
Big Bang Fireworks (UK)
BBF
Beer Buddies Forever
Above acronyms from:
http://acronyms.thefreedictionary.com/BBF

and then there is the one that I heard mentioned at Charlotte's Birthday Party on Friday night: Google BBF Paris Hilton and you get many options to read about Paris Hilton's reality TV show entitled a post-ironic, post-funny "Paris Hilton's British Best Friend" that's based in--wait for it--Britain.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paris_Hilton


and then there was my definition as was entered in Zoe-speak, the lexicon for my blog--"BBF: Beloved Best Friend(s)"--and which referred to my Kelly and my Dolly. I have now removed the embarrassing acronym from "Quash Cancer" as it is my intent to somehow in this lifetime ensure that I have more than 6 degrees of separation from Ms. Hilton.

I like totally didn't know, you know? Like seriously.



Saturday, April 4, 2009

Cram Parenting


It has been a super-challenging ten days from a parenting perspective. In June 2008 I officially got 100% custody of my two kids--14-year-old Zack and 12-year-old Charlotte. Unfortunately, June 2008 was also the month that I unexpectedly had major surgery and a month after I had found out that I had a cancer recurrence.


Since then I have been on overdrive, trying to figure out how to cram in all of life's learning that a mother should impart to her kids. I feel kind of sorry for them. There is almost no day that goes by without me jumping up on my soap-box trying to instill and solidify fine human being traits. They are such great kids and I want them to be safe and secure no matter what the future holds. This sometimes looks like me being a super "over-protective parent" which I am to understand is an insult but which I consider to be my job. My job is not to be "fair" or "nice" or "their friend." My job is to keep them safe and if that means that I have to say "No" to certain desired activities then that is what I will do. I'm not trying to win a popularity contest though I notice time and time again that after tempers cool, the kids acknowledge their appreciation that I have their back and that "on the big things" I am pretty cool and even in the case of my eldest who didn't speak to me for several days recently, he made a joke about what I had not allowed the week prior and I got to see that seeing through a boundary means that they know that my word means something and that I will do my best to keep them out of risky situations.

Sometimes trying to support them is my saying "Yes" to things that I would never have imagined. I'll digress for a moment. On Monday after my acupuncture appointment I took myself to Granville Island for lunch. I got some Indian veg on a stainless steel thali plate and went and sat down on the other side sharing a table with a woman around my age who was waiting for a friend.

The woman and I started to chat...she was saying how much she liked the Indian food and that she always brings a tiffin from work and that they have about 40 of them for all the staff to use and I asked her what kind of business and she said "we develop video games." By now her friend has arrived and I say "Oh, too bad my son isn't here...I know nothing about video games but he loves them." Then I asked what titles they had done and she said "Oh, ones that your 14 year old shouldn't be playing...they are militaristic." "Oh I said, my son just got one of those (actually now two as of yesterday)." The woman's friend said "Oh, I wouldn't let my kids play those" and I remarked that "well, many of his friends have those kinds of games and so he would be playing them anyways and I want my kids to want to have their friends over. I can't stand those games and won't even go in the same room with them when they are on but I have an agreement that is that (a) anything that is in our house in mine and anything may be confiscated if I decide that it should be and (b) that I will take games away if I don't see a huge distinction between the mood and attitude of those games and his behaviour at home and away from home. We have an understanding you could say.

I also had a mini brainwave last night in the "If you can't beat them, join them" realm and asked Zack if there might be a game that I would like and that he would be willing to play with me. Charlotte was intrigued as well and we went to Blockbuster video today to see what there might be. Charlotte and I went staight to the good deal bin and Zack came and found us a couple of minutes later, excitedly indicating that he found the one...Rock Band...with drum kit, guitar and mike. "I call drum kit," I say. "I call guitar," adds Zack. "I want to be the singer," say Charlotte. And "The Defacers" was born. I was trying for "The Kick-Ass Trio" but Zack said "Nothing with Trio in it."

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Creative Flatulence...aka BFO "Sharing"




There is something strange going on in my brain, rendering me odder and more eccentric than ever. I think that part of it is that I am theoretically a dying woman and as such feel unencumbered by many of the neuroses that I spent this life thinking were concrete reasons why I couldn't be happy or just be content or at peace. But there's much more to it.

I would not dream of pretending that I know. I am reminded my mentor and her "Auntie Lalitha Rule #1" which is "Things are Not as they Appear." So it appears like boo-hoo so sad single-mom Zoë, recurrent cancer, going through chemo...But except for the rough bits--that thankfully have a beginning, a middle, and a end--life is awesome. I really feel engaged in life. I am in love with life. I do not feel sorry for myself in any way...though I will admit to sometimes wishing for a bit of a breather when the Universe sends me torrents of new opportunities with such force and speed that I don't even have a chance to complete and in and out breath prior to the next onslaught.
So one of the amusing-to-me things that I have noticed is that my marketing brain is locked into "on" mode 24/7. Literally, every day, for weeks now, I hear myself making a marketing suggestion to someone in business. I generally say that it's a "freebie" and "on the house" though sometimes I say it would be nice to get credit and Michael needs to keep picking up lunch tabs if I give him a really good idea that he hasn't already thought of.

Here are some recent examples:

Plant Nursery
I was trying to track down a certain plant--Sarcaccoca--and was phoning around. The fellow at nursery told me that he had had some but that he had had to throw themall away as they had sustained so much damage because of our brutal winter. We got to talking about business and how tough retail is in general and then to add a tough winter and a brutal economy. I said that I was glad that I made "non-perishable" goods.


Then I had a mini brainwave. I told him that I thought that people would still spend money on their gardens especially as they would likely be spending more time at home as people curtail some of their extraneous spending, that there was even signs of a trend for people to have "staycations" where they stay at home and holiday in their own cities, and that I thought that one change is that people would be doing more of the gardening work themselves--to save money, because they have more time, and because putting one's hand in soil and nurturing plants and watching them thrive is a powerful antidote to the crazies that seemingly have struck most of our planet. I suggested to him that they hold themed workshops for people who want to learn how to pick out plants, create moods in their gardens, etc. etc. and that they could offer a 10% off for class participants on the day of the workshop. He was all ears and said that he would raise the idea. "If you end up using my idea perhaps I could have a one-time 10% off my purchases?" I asked him his name and told him mine but he didn't ask for a phone number so I'm not holding my breath. But if you notice that Southlands is putting on new workshops this spring or summer, think of me.

American Apparel
I can't remember now if I already wrote about my idea for American Apparel...in their store they carry great-quality, well-priced cotton basics that are made in the US, they also have some very well-designed, though more expensive women's cotton basics and between Zack, Charlotte and me and its location in Kits I am in the store about once every couple months or so. Kelly--generous and most perfect BBF that she is--to paint me a top or dress for me that has a... ahem...communication on it. I went online to look at American Apparel's tops as I am more horizontal than vertical these days (though not in the fun way) and I was taken aback my how skanky their website is. Go see what I mean: Go to http://store.americanapparel.ca/women.html and check out the Nylon Spandex Micro-Mesh Long Sleeve Mini Dress. I think that I'll get one in every colour. So I was really struck by that skanky aspect of their product line...something that you don't really notice in their stores...and what a poor fit their "Nouveau Classique" tagline was for their brand. So, I wrote to them and even gave them my email address as they promised emphatically that they responded to each and every email that they receive from customers and suggested that they go with what they do best, that makes them unique in the market place, that their positioning statement be "Retro Skank." I think that is is incredibly apropos but it's been a couple of weeks now and I haven't even received the most perfunctory response.


Sock Dreams
I am an odd combination of being extremely frugal about some things and have an absolute love of deals, bargains, second-hand clothes, unloved and unappreciated treasures etc. and then can be an absolute spendthrift under different circumstances, especially for local art as well as some rather eccentric things such as socks. Well to keep this post short-ish and to get it done before I have to begin my Mama-make-breakfast-and-shepherd-kids-out-the-door routine, I will summarize my interactions with this online store who I have bought hundreds of dollars of socks from over the years and though until yesterday had never, at least knowingly spoken to the owner, have been blown away by their product and their customer-service orientation. I was in contact with Sock Dreams as I wanted a custom-designed pair of tie-dyed fingerless gloves that incorporated "Quash Pink" so that I could wear them with my "Kick Cancer's Butt" hot pink patent Docs.

To make a long story short I ended up in direct contact with the tie-dye guy and he made me a custom pair to my specs...actually about 5 or 6 to choose from and then I received an email from the owner yesterday linking me to their website...and look what I saw... http://www.sockdreams.com/_shop/pages/socks_detail_ProductID_1487.php.

If you scroll down to the "Screaming Peacocks" you will see the designs that I inspired and the best of the best--which are like design the "Spiral Purple Green & Blue" that are shown on someone's arms--are being sent to me gratis and they are going to be reordering more for their online store. And how sweet is that, that they called them "Screaming Peacocks" as a way to acknowledge my input and also so that if people would google that name they would find me and my business. I believe that I have e-met an kindred marketing spirit.

More tomorrow...hot air you can count on!

*Image posted without permission from: http://scienceguy288.files.wordpress.com/2008/01/cow.gif

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Contemplating Karma Part III

After acupuncture on Monday, I drove to Granville Island to do an errand, poke about and have lunch. There was a service guy at the house and Tom was handling that so I figured that since I couldn't actually go home and nap for an hour or so that I might as well go enjoy myself.

When I got home, I walked in the door and was struck by the most massive, most gorgeous bouqet of flowers that I have ever seen. Irreverent as usual my first words were "Did I die?!" I couldn't imagine who might have sent them or why and at first thought that there was no card. When I found it though I was came undone. The flowers had been sent by someone whom I had done a favour for, a favour that I had intended to be kept anonymous but the recipient wanted to say what my favour had meant to her. I am so very touched.

Yesterday, when I returned home from physio, I walked into the kitchen and there was another bouquet of flowers--sassy, bright and cheery gerberas, that have two-toned petals, orange on the front and yellow on the back. I couldn't believe the syncronicity as I had just bought myself a gift at Granville Island market...a gorgeous wood vase--with glass insert--that is stained the exact same colour orange as the flowers. With the flowers, was a vessel of homemade soup with a note saying "made with love for Zoe" and crackers for the soup.

Then I found a card, that had been hand-delivered--a very authentic, risk-taking note from a somewhat estranged friend. "How rare," I thought, "for someone to take the time to write a reflective note regarding regret that a friendship has lapsed." That made me cry too.

Anyone who's known me since childhood would attest to the fact that I cry easily. I am an emoter. Happy, sad, mad, scared...you're in my vicinity...you're going to know what's going on with me, even if I am not saying anything.

It actually caused problems for me in my worklife. I remember one time, when I was working as an advertising account executive for a big agency, that there was a big meeting in the board room as the creatives pitched their ideas to help the corporate client to improve their public image. What the creatives came up with was excellent and would have worked but there was a big problem...the two clients kept saying "We can't say that. We can't say that." I guess that my disgust had shown on my face as I realized that the reason that our well-designed campaign was not going to get the go-ahead was that they actually were doing a poor job stewarding the natural resource and actually deserved the poor opinion that the public held of them.


I was pulled aside by my supervisor following the brutal meeting and she told me that I absolutely had to learn to have a better "poker face." That was close to the end of my career in high-stakes advertising and I never did develop much skill at hiding when I am not on the same page with someone. I don't value inauthenticity in others and am not so inclined to be better at hiding what I really think. Some softening has occurred over the years as I knock into sharp edges of life but if I would have to say that I am still an opinionated hard-ass, except when I am a complete and tender mushball.

It's kind of fascinating to me what has transpired over the last three days...there were two really, really tough days during which I just had to cling tenaciously to my goal of thriving my way through whatever "opportunities" the Universe was wanting to offer up. Feeling so ill and weak, I was reminded in each moment that I had to be so careful of where I would "spend" my energy.

There were three people whom I was having tricky interactions with...with two I tried my best to really listen to what they wanted and needed and did my best to remain in relationship whilst working out the contentious bits. These were both men. In the third situation I drew a very clear boundary and indicated that this person could choose either side. She chose the not agreeing to my boundary option and wished me well...I'm feeling a bit sketchy about someone saying she is "praying for me everyday" but wants nothing to do with me and really wanted to say "please don't!" but I figured I would just be adding kindling to the fiery situation and that I should just let her have the last word.

Oh, one more absolutely wonderful thing that happened yesterday...I was on my way to physio and I saw three guys outside the house that is opposite from the "meditation in action" house...ie three houses to the east of our house...two of the guys were putting the tell-tale orange plastic fencing around the trees on the boulevard. I was ecstatic for two reasons: (1) It meant that the teardown and redo would happen at the same time as opposed to after the other house and (2) that I could find out who to ask about what was going to be happening to all the plants. I walked up to the three guys and asked if any of them were or knew how to contact the contractor or owner of the property. They all just stared at me shaking their heads but when I added that I was just wondering about some of the plants in the back, one of the guys said "You show me" and we clambered over piles of rubble to get to the back...I asked about a decades old quince that I have admired each of the 18 Springs that I have walked down our back lane." "There will be garage there," he said with a slavic accent. "Oh, so I may have this?" He nodded. "And these blackberry bushes outside the lane?" He nodded. "And these cuttings from the quince, so that I can force them inside?" He said "You can have everything. Just take before April 15th. Everything come down."

Well I was beside myself! I had to zip to my physio but I phoned Kim (part owner of Petals and Pots who helps me with my garden and who was planning on coming to help me with soil amending and planting some plants) on Thursday. I told her with great glee what had just occurred and when they might be able to swing by...they actually spent a couple hours yesterday afternoon, finding treasures like two white ribes, and a grape vine, and, and, and. And the blackberries...well my kids, who were literally born in this house, have spent every August of their lives, toddling, biking, scootering, unicycling down the lane to pick blackberries. Now this will continue for them and for all the other neighbourhood kids.


When I moved into my house, there was just a widower living there and I heard that many years prior his wife and child had diedin a tragic accident. It was perhaps his wife who had planted and cared for those plants decades ago, maybe even 40 years ago. I am going to find out more about the family so that I can properly honour these gorgeous old-timey treasures.



As I write this post, it is snowing outside! It is April 1st and it is snowing. Tell me again about global warming? Bundle up dear ones and expect the unexpected.